Yesterday my mom was helping me pack stuff in the car and in an attempt to get it all into the vehicle (which by the way my parents brought the smaller car, ????? okay, parents) my mom encouraged me to throw out lots of stuff so I ended up throwing out 90% of my schoolwork and a bunch of unused supplies and some other stuff, and then it turned out we still couldn’t get it all in the car so we had to come back again the next day so all of the stuff thrown out was all wasted for nought. 

P.S. I’ve been gone from RISD for barely a day and I’m already bored hahaha never thought I would miss needed work to to everyday. Also it’s very lonesome up in this trailer park but at least my dog likes to hang out with me up in the loft so I get to snuggle with her

pup pup pup pup puppy pup

haha I completely stopped caring about how I look a long time ago and I’m noticing now that my hair got ridiculously too long and also that I got p flabby
Weh weh I wish I were pretty

pff i am the worst at finishing lib arts work and handing in essays at the proper length, but at least handing in any paper at all is better than not handing it in hahaha @u@

ghhggh I am still getting so much amusement from people who don’t know things at school

Like when people explain basic biology in the form of “well actually” to me or don’t understand that something is (x) and not (y) even when it comes with a label

upd8 #3, a nice boy said hi to me so I’m feeling better

Today I was super late for class because I was consoling someone about something important over the phone (I probably should have asked them if I could call back but it seemed like a bad idea given the context ggghh) and when I came in everyone went quiet and stared at me the teacher made a joking(?) comment in front of the whole class about if it was because I was writing my paper just before class and I got really pissed off and made a scene and it was embarrassing and just wow this on top of me presenting a bad project idea yesterday and giving an embarrassingly short presentation in art history all of that on top of each other im pretty sure the whole school hates me

my only saving grace is that 9/10 my classmates flipping adore my projects from class so like

okay not really a saving grace because everything else about me is just managing my time really badly and being dumb and just being a mean person

Trying to be optimistic about everything has been really helpful with controlling how much of a stupid mess I am with emotions and social problems but sometimes I think it comes off as me looking like I’m crazy???? idk man whadda u think

one of my favorite things ever is when my fellow art students make asses of themselves by over explaining really mundane or obvious things just because they hadn’t know about them (and I mean like the upperclass white people explaining things upperclass white people should know about). Probably because I have way too high expectations of how eclectic everyone’s knowledge of potpourri here should be, haha. Still tho. When someone starts going on about the process of their piece like “so I wanted to slice this fruit into very thin pieces and I found this special device that you can actually use to cut fruit and vegetables into slices 6/8 or 4/8 of an inch thick it’s very facinati-” “dude, you mean a mandoline?” “…”

I kind of wish that our school didn’t force us to buy $400 worth of fake risd money that we, as freshmen with unlimited normal meals, can only spend on junkfood items like cookies and ramen and instant food because like????????? I don’t want to waste 400 gosh dang dollars but I can feel myself turning into a salty slime blob. Like since the day that the lunch lady told me I had $260 left to spend in 4 weeks I suddenly started breaking out for the first time in months and just wow I am very saddened by this whole situation.

fun fact of the day sonic.exe is probably the prime example of how creepy pasta can be the dumbest thing ever